Sept. 9, 2011
Ephesians 4:31
"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice."
This seems to be impossible for me. Anger constantly takes hold of my words, and thoughts, especially if someone I'm talking to is "giving me lip". I want to let the "malice" flow and for them to see how they are acting makes me resent them. It's my natural reaction. Unfortunately this is everyone's natural reaction, so if we all succumbed to such things, then we'd all have never-ending arguments that in no way edify the body of Christ. No one would be built up and the selfishness in all of us would flourish (as if we need to give it leeway to do that, it's already spreading without us acknowledging it!). Just as I write this blog I found myself getting rebuked by a fellow intern. In my flesh, I tried to be coy, and rebuke them right back. That's what the devil wanted. And it left both of us feeling awkward and, I know for myself, bitterness to assemble. God wishes us to let these thoughts go. This involves putting yourself away. I am especially convicted of this when I go into my room later that night, and I read, on a note placed on my bed, "When… your opinions ridiculed, and you refuse to let anger rise in your heart or even defend yourself, but take it all in patient loving silence. THAT IS DYING TO SELF". I had not been doing that at all, and I don't want my spiteful words to take hold of my actions and create someone who is filled with selfishness.
I want to be able to admit when I let my anger provoke my words. I want to eat a big piece of humble pie with dignity when something arises where I would initially try to "get even" with the things I say. In this way, following God's words of speaking good to my brothers, putting away all bitterness.
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